I sometimes switch the XM Satellite radio in my car to “Audio Visions.” Yes, it is the “new age” channel, but don’t judge me. Usually, I find nothing to offend my Christian sensibilities in the instrumentals and even I need a break from the classic rock stations (and certainly from my less frequent attempts to find something that connects with me on XM’s interpretation of a Christian station, which seems at times to me less worship than sanitized teen pop, sadly). Plus, it is a very surreal experience to drive through crowds, traffic and chaos listening to the same music you heard in the massage therapy office. Especially as I navigate the phenomenon we have in the states known as the “school pick-up line,” the contrast between the inside and outside of my car is fascinating—outside flustered teachers try to control both the cars and the kids and inside water flows, birds sing while pan pipes sound…makes me smile and laugh and reminds me metaphorically that whatever is playing in my real inner world is indeed portable!
XM graciously reminds you which station you have chosen every quarter hour or so. For Audio Visions, this exercise is conducted by someone with an East Indian accent who also adds a tagline intended to further inspire. The last time I was listening to Audio Visions was October 31st--one of those days that I was trying to be calm in the midst of chaos. I was doing last minute things to prepare for a never-before attempted “Enter Narnia” night for children in which our church was conducting a walk-through wardrobe experience, complete with a crowning ceremony, for each participant, as well as something we called Aslan’s warrior training course, which I will leave to your imagination. We also had several other ambitious attempts to capitalize on the movie-generated buzz surrounding the timeless classic. We had mailed out 800 fliers and since our new property is highly visible, and so-called “Halloween alternatives” are well attended in the states, we were assured a crowd and excited about the possibilities.
Because I don’t believe in doing an event that we don’t first experience, I had been teaching our youth (who were the prime movers in terms of actual work) about the real Narnia—the spirit dimension. We had been talking about what it means to go through the wardrobe, so to speak, every day, choosing again and again to live from the realm where love has conquered death and where we already reign as kings and queens through the victory won for us. A Savior on the move to erase winter and restore the flesh of those turned to stone is, after all, the essence of the Christian message. What’s not to experience?
These were the precipitous circumstances on Oct 31st that would cause me to react with surprise to an XM station identification that I know I must have heard before. When my Indian-sounding friend said, “Audio Visions: Follow me through the looking glass…” I was captivated! For the rest of the day, I was gone down a path of comparison between the Lewis Carroll classic and the C.S. Lewis one and the vast rays of understanding shed by their difference!
I read Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass as a young child and discovered simultaneously the power of literature and the impressionability of my own psyche. No one knew—because I didn’t express all my thoughts then as I do now—what havoc it wreaked upon me. But I clearly remember journeying in my imagination with Alice down the rabbit hole and through the looking glass. In my childlike struggle to sort out the visible world, Alice’s “other” world left a mark of fear upon me—much like Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon journey into madness. I cannot remember a time in my life when I was for one second a materialist: I have always sensed that there is more to life than meets the eye. Lewis Carroll’s (perhaps opiate-induced) visions may have been intended as harmless fantasy, but they actually filled me with the fear that the invisible world was distorted and mad, chaotic and eerie—always a note out of tune and a few degrees off center, cycling on and on without hope of correction. (And all those around me just thought I was reading a children’s classic.)
Sadly, I missed out on Narnia until I was an adult. By that time, I had already discovered the truth about the invisible realm. My insatiable seeking had been answered by the true King. Yes, there are dark forces and strange happenings to be fought through, but the heart--the essence--the overwhelming tone and tenor of the universe is the immeasurably good heart of a Creator God who welcomes his children both to intimacy and information about all that He intends. I knew the story before I read the metaphor and it only made me love the metaphor all the more. C.S. Lewis expressed through The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe the invisible world that is absolutely true, totally available and unexplainably healing to those who have been frightened by bizarre facsimiles.
Here are two children’s classics that made indelible marks on popular culture. One produced feelings of meaninglessness (at least in me) and would later become a sort of literary mascot for the drug culture in the 60’s—a permission slip to go so far beyond the looking glass that many would not return! Ironically, Lewis Carroll (real name, Charles Dodgson) was trained to be an Anglican priest although he never accepted the position. There is evidence that he was interested in theosophy and alternative forms of spiritual searching. Clive Staples Lewis, however, did all his searching before he entered the faith and did not enter until he was fully convinced. His conversion may not have been loud or celebrated, but it was complete, and the art he produced could not fail to be lit up by it. Lewis produced a classic children’s tale which bore like seed in the wind the sum total of all meaning. Narnia grounds us far more than the looking glass could ever disturb us.
As I continued to ponder the divergent worldviews of the two men with “Lewis” in their names—I realized, however, that it was symbolic of much more. Why did XM choose an Indian voice for their soothing ID? Because Audio Visions, and New Age in general, is but evidence of a huge philosophical swing in the west which is causing us, after many years of asserting our superiority, to finally humble ourselves and accept the wise men from the mysterious “EAST”.
Our rational medicine alone can’t save us—now we are open to acupuncture and massage. Our attempts to organize our lives and businesses have fallen short of being able to handle the organisms we call “humans”—Skinner and Pavlov were wrong: we are not all predictable machines! Now, we resource ourselves with touchy-feely spiritual seminars that are designed to connect, lead and motivate on levels much deeper than behavior. And our understanding of the universe has betrayed us. Quantum physics has lead the most left-brained experts into a world that sounds more like Narnia than the one that many churches describe! East is everywhere meeting West and the XM marketers know that. (In parts of America such as the one I live, this is an even bigger deal, since this mindset is not being brought by any actual emigrants, but by the pop culture alone. You haven’t lived until you get to watch, as I have, a big, tough redneck Texas cowboy get a Chinese medicine staple inserted in his ear for appetite control from a local chiropractor…I rest my case…)
In the body of Christ, we have been taught to shun the east, but it needs to be pointed out that there is a huge difference between “eastern thought patterns” and “eastern religion” (perhaps as large a difference as there is between Christianity itself and religion!!!). Eastern religion is the enemy camping out on the right side of the brain and filling the flesh with imaginative ideas upon which demons can entrench themselves. But eastern thought: that is a different story. Eastern thought is simply stepping through the boundary and admitting that there is another side of the equation. If you are Lewis Carroll, it will be a looking glass and madness, but you need not give up the quest. If you are C.S. Lewis, it will be a wardrobe and a wonderful world of deep magic that heals the soul forever. It is the observers call whether that barrier through which we “break on through to the other side” turns out to be a looking glass or a wardrobe!
Let’s not shun the collective quest in society for a bigger picture of reality. If the church (as it must have done in Lewis Carroll’s day) fails to paint the vistas of invisible landscape clearly with the words of Scripture, then many voices will describe the bizarre apparitions of randomness, because the spiritual nature of man will not give up the search. Scripture itself declares and centers upon the fact that there is an alternate--or more accurately, supplemental—reality beyond the one the physical senses take in.
The mere fact that God is declared by the Bible to be “invisible” tells us everything about how to live: the real meaning of anything will not be found without factoring in that dimension. (I Timothy 1:17) The same Scripture describes God as “immortal”; therefore, any analysis of life is incomplete if limited to one moment. It is only the eternal perspective that will yield the truth. In other words, the complete picture of any situation is found not in the facts as they have presented themselves alone, but also in the invisible potential of the Kingdom of God to manifest through those facts! We need to see the scenes in our lives not as photos, but holograms!
When Phillip (Acts 8) was told to leave the revival in Samaria and go down a lonely road, he found a traveler from the court of the Queen of Ethiopia who was struggling to understand the book of Isaiah. Rather than trying the latest evangelism technique, Phillip simply connected with the search the Ethiopian was already on by asking, “Do you understand what you are reading?” The Ethiopian’s reply is a challenge we cannot ignore: “How can I if there is no guide?” New age paganism advertises “spirit guides” as a means of enlightenment and any real Christian reels in horror at the potential danger. BUT, if Christians have not offered ourselves to guide them through the invisible world—that is, if all we do is warn them about the dangers of the dark side, but never open up a wardrobe leading to the vibrancies of the one true INVISIBLE God--can we blame them for going through the looking glass?
The pantheistic tendencies in Western culture need not be feared, but rather rerouted to the invisible Truth. I now realize that I am dangerously close to gross overuse of a metaphor, but my passion will now make me cross that line, almost proudly. We can either offer the world an entrance into Narnia where they will discover redemption, or we can leave them to search for their momentary and ultimately unfulfilling escapes from life “through the looking glass.” If all they find is soothing music and a massage, they will not be changed. What if we said yes to the challenge (as many are) and refuse to fear the eastern thought swing since the God we serve is Lord of the whole compass and the whole brain? What might emerge from our courage and what Kingdom possibilities might actualize? What is the invisible side of the picture of the philosophical timeline of Western culture? I think the ice just might be melting…
Saturday, November 03, 2007
Friday, September 07, 2007
Tommy the Rock Opera
I am finally reviving my blog and I want anyone reading to know that the absence of posts for a while now has not occurred because I ran out of things to say! I have had some significant opportunities to "say" things to some live groups recently and have spent alot of time with other forms of communication beyond blogging! But, it is nice to get back to the "coracle" that is this blog--where I just spill out my inner world into the vast cyber-ocean and wonder whose shoreline I will hit...the chaos of it all is intoxicating.
We were just in Lincoln, England at the Grapevine Celebration/Conference specifically in the large tent they call "Glory." As always, I passionately fired out my inspiration about the redemptive potential in the world around us and sought to bring--not just bring, but display, animate and set free, my Kingdom message. I am intoxicated with the call to present true Christianity to this generation and I happen to hear that call not just from heaven, but from the voices of postmodern poets and thinkers themselves!!! (They don't know that it is to Jesus they are calling, because they don't yet have an accurate image of Him! That is where you and I come in!)
What I LOVE about my own journey is that God never lets it get boring! Just when I think I know the boundaries of what I have to say, God seems to step right past them and ask me (metaphorically speaking) "can you see me now?"! This time it was Tommy the Rock Opera by the Who. I had, a couple of months ago, become interested in re-discovering the "See me, touch me, feel me..." song from Tommy, but since Tommy was one of the few classic albums I did not myself own, I didn't know which song title to download to my iPod. After a few tries, I found "We're Not Gonna Take It" at the conclusion of the album. When I first was able to listen to it, I was on the treadmill at the gym. Halfway through, Roger Daltrey began the raspy see me, feel me, touch me, heal me... and then...oh then....the music shifted and there came the rapturous moment I was looking for:
Listening to you, I hear the music; Gazing at you, I get the heat
Following you, I climb the mountain; I get excitement at your feet
Right behind you, I see the millions; On you, I see the glory
From you, I get opinions; from you, I get the story....
And, as you know, it repeats again and again in what may be the only rock approximation of the number of times we charismatics repeat a worship chorus.
As I was brought back into contact with these words after so many years, I was broken. Here in the lyrics of an album written by a guitar smashing rebel--an album which was banned in both the U.S. and the U.K. for its explicit contents--was what to me the most poignant cry for a real Messiah imaginable! It is as if Pete Townshend shifted accidentally from writing about his pinball wizard hero to tapping the universal longing for a Savior that is buried in all mankind!! I thought as I heard it: "That's Jesus--the real Jesus! That is a perfect description of what Jesus is to me...." I wiped tears from my eyes as I still tried to navigate treading the mill...
It was one thing to feel that at the gym, but quite another to present it in public, however. I take time constraints seriously and the morning talks in the Glory venue were to be an hour--I have so much to say that it was too large a risk to launch out into what might be a private epiphany rabbit trail that would not necessarily bless all the Grapevine attendees! And yet, I couldn't get away from it and I felt God smiling inside me at the prospect. On the second morning of the event, I heard myself, as I talked about Paul at Athens, say, "Let me give you an example of today's poets..." and I read out the lyrics above.
I've been thinking about it ever since--and treasuring the original LP of Tommy that one of my friends presented to me the next day (my youngest child asked to hold the vinyl disc in his hand, never having seen anything but a CD). The more I think about it, the more I am amazed at this altar to the unknown (by The Who at least) God! The last two lines, especially, are the things I want to shout from the rooftops.
"From you, I get opinions..." My greatest fear of Christianity was the false notion that it would rob me of my color, life and spice and somehow turn me into a chapter and verse quoting clone who processed life through an emotionless grid. Nothing could be farther from the truth: Rather than depriving me of a personality, God through Christ in my life has caused a personality to blossom that amazes even me, its owner! I am honestly always surprising myself as I discover the swirls and splotches in my inner world! From HIM, I got, not a deprival of individuality, but the right to have "opinions" and "passions" and, for the milder among us "interests".
Though it's a chick flick and a lightweight one at that, Runaway Bride has a scene that moves me. Richard Gere challenges Julia Roberts to quit codependently adapting to every guy she dates. He notices that, out of her need to be accepted, she adapts to every like or disklike her current fiance has, right down to how they like their eggs cooked. His point blank question to her is "How do YOU like your eggs?" After she runs (yet again) and finds herself alone, she finally decides to face her inner demons. The camera shows her cooking every form of eggs imaginable from baked to Benedict and then sampling them one by one carefully until from within her finally a preference of her own emerges. She dared to have AN OPINION, rather than just losing herself into the safe territory of other people's strong prescriptions! THAT'S what Jesus did for me--he made me know that I am a unique individual who bears the brushstrokes of the Creator! If I am a Pollock or a Kandinsky, it's no use trying to look like a Rembrandt! From YOU I get OPINIONS...From YOU, Jesus, I find my own distinctive as well as the grace to add that to the community in which you have placed me! I don't have to fight for my opinions because IT'S YOU who gave them to me! I can rest in who I am....
But, even bigger than that, Townshend wrote, "From you, I get the story." What a great word for a postmodern world that has already realized that everyone has a story. Sometimes the story of our own lives is not one that we enjoy or want to tell. But, if that is the case, we simply have yet to see THE story! God has an over-arching story that always ends in glory for those who keep their eyes on Him. I can refuse earthly interpretations of my life and circumstances and wait for the story that comes from heaven to my heart. I can refuse judgments and prejudices towards other people--even when they hurt me--and tune in closer to God to get the story from Him. I only want HIS story--the redemptive one--the one that ends in resurrection even when the night of death has been so dark! From YOU I get THE story...and once I get it, everything makes sense. (It's worth waiting at his feet for as long as it takes...)
Back home in Azle, I shared these Tommy words with my youth group this week (and showed them the oddity of a 33 1/3 LP). I don't know if they were nearly as passionate as my British friends, but my own passion remained unflagged. (It's my opinion and has become my story...) I looked at their faces and thought about how the world is trying to mold them into people without authentic opinion and the enemy is trying to sell them a counterfeit story...and then I waxed exceedingly passionate about how we have a Savior that answers the cry of true rock and roll. Maybe they aren't music historians, and maybe the true cry of rock and roll is just far too "out there" to mention in Bible belt church (but watch me). Still, the song remains the same through all walks of life. Whatever mountain man is attempting to climb--whatever the quest of heart--Jesus is standing at the top offering the only real fulfillment. THAT is what a Savior does. No one can imagine a hero that Jesus doesn't meet and, by light years, exceed. Go ahead,: hear the music, feel the heat, climb the mountain, see the glroy... and then let the camera pan back from your Savior and you, too, will the millions waiting for what you have found. Your worship will be your sending and your life will be full.
We were just in Lincoln, England at the Grapevine Celebration/Conference specifically in the large tent they call "Glory." As always, I passionately fired out my inspiration about the redemptive potential in the world around us and sought to bring--not just bring, but display, animate and set free, my Kingdom message. I am intoxicated with the call to present true Christianity to this generation and I happen to hear that call not just from heaven, but from the voices of postmodern poets and thinkers themselves!!! (They don't know that it is to Jesus they are calling, because they don't yet have an accurate image of Him! That is where you and I come in!)
What I LOVE about my own journey is that God never lets it get boring! Just when I think I know the boundaries of what I have to say, God seems to step right past them and ask me (metaphorically speaking) "can you see me now?"! This time it was Tommy the Rock Opera by the Who. I had, a couple of months ago, become interested in re-discovering the "See me, touch me, feel me..." song from Tommy, but since Tommy was one of the few classic albums I did not myself own, I didn't know which song title to download to my iPod. After a few tries, I found "We're Not Gonna Take It" at the conclusion of the album. When I first was able to listen to it, I was on the treadmill at the gym. Halfway through, Roger Daltrey began the raspy see me, feel me, touch me, heal me... and then...oh then....the music shifted and there came the rapturous moment I was looking for:
Listening to you, I hear the music; Gazing at you, I get the heat
Following you, I climb the mountain; I get excitement at your feet
Right behind you, I see the millions; On you, I see the glory
From you, I get opinions; from you, I get the story....
And, as you know, it repeats again and again in what may be the only rock approximation of the number of times we charismatics repeat a worship chorus.
As I was brought back into contact with these words after so many years, I was broken. Here in the lyrics of an album written by a guitar smashing rebel--an album which was banned in both the U.S. and the U.K. for its explicit contents--was what to me the most poignant cry for a real Messiah imaginable! It is as if Pete Townshend shifted accidentally from writing about his pinball wizard hero to tapping the universal longing for a Savior that is buried in all mankind!! I thought as I heard it: "That's Jesus--the real Jesus! That is a perfect description of what Jesus is to me...." I wiped tears from my eyes as I still tried to navigate treading the mill...
It was one thing to feel that at the gym, but quite another to present it in public, however. I take time constraints seriously and the morning talks in the Glory venue were to be an hour--I have so much to say that it was too large a risk to launch out into what might be a private epiphany rabbit trail that would not necessarily bless all the Grapevine attendees! And yet, I couldn't get away from it and I felt God smiling inside me at the prospect. On the second morning of the event, I heard myself, as I talked about Paul at Athens, say, "Let me give you an example of today's poets..." and I read out the lyrics above.
I've been thinking about it ever since--and treasuring the original LP of Tommy that one of my friends presented to me the next day (my youngest child asked to hold the vinyl disc in his hand, never having seen anything but a CD). The more I think about it, the more I am amazed at this altar to the unknown (by The Who at least) God! The last two lines, especially, are the things I want to shout from the rooftops.
"From you, I get opinions..." My greatest fear of Christianity was the false notion that it would rob me of my color, life and spice and somehow turn me into a chapter and verse quoting clone who processed life through an emotionless grid. Nothing could be farther from the truth: Rather than depriving me of a personality, God through Christ in my life has caused a personality to blossom that amazes even me, its owner! I am honestly always surprising myself as I discover the swirls and splotches in my inner world! From HIM, I got, not a deprival of individuality, but the right to have "opinions" and "passions" and, for the milder among us "interests".
Though it's a chick flick and a lightweight one at that, Runaway Bride has a scene that moves me. Richard Gere challenges Julia Roberts to quit codependently adapting to every guy she dates. He notices that, out of her need to be accepted, she adapts to every like or disklike her current fiance has, right down to how they like their eggs cooked. His point blank question to her is "How do YOU like your eggs?" After she runs (yet again) and finds herself alone, she finally decides to face her inner demons. The camera shows her cooking every form of eggs imaginable from baked to Benedict and then sampling them one by one carefully until from within her finally a preference of her own emerges. She dared to have AN OPINION, rather than just losing herself into the safe territory of other people's strong prescriptions! THAT'S what Jesus did for me--he made me know that I am a unique individual who bears the brushstrokes of the Creator! If I am a Pollock or a Kandinsky, it's no use trying to look like a Rembrandt! From YOU I get OPINIONS...From YOU, Jesus, I find my own distinctive as well as the grace to add that to the community in which you have placed me! I don't have to fight for my opinions because IT'S YOU who gave them to me! I can rest in who I am....
But, even bigger than that, Townshend wrote, "From you, I get the story." What a great word for a postmodern world that has already realized that everyone has a story. Sometimes the story of our own lives is not one that we enjoy or want to tell. But, if that is the case, we simply have yet to see THE story! God has an over-arching story that always ends in glory for those who keep their eyes on Him. I can refuse earthly interpretations of my life and circumstances and wait for the story that comes from heaven to my heart. I can refuse judgments and prejudices towards other people--even when they hurt me--and tune in closer to God to get the story from Him. I only want HIS story--the redemptive one--the one that ends in resurrection even when the night of death has been so dark! From YOU I get THE story...and once I get it, everything makes sense. (It's worth waiting at his feet for as long as it takes...)
Back home in Azle, I shared these Tommy words with my youth group this week (and showed them the oddity of a 33 1/3 LP). I don't know if they were nearly as passionate as my British friends, but my own passion remained unflagged. (It's my opinion and has become my story...) I looked at their faces and thought about how the world is trying to mold them into people without authentic opinion and the enemy is trying to sell them a counterfeit story...and then I waxed exceedingly passionate about how we have a Savior that answers the cry of true rock and roll. Maybe they aren't music historians, and maybe the true cry of rock and roll is just far too "out there" to mention in Bible belt church (but watch me). Still, the song remains the same through all walks of life. Whatever mountain man is attempting to climb--whatever the quest of heart--Jesus is standing at the top offering the only real fulfillment. THAT is what a Savior does. No one can imagine a hero that Jesus doesn't meet and, by light years, exceed. Go ahead,: hear the music, feel the heat, climb the mountain, see the glroy... and then let the camera pan back from your Savior and you, too, will the millions waiting for what you have found. Your worship will be your sending and your life will be full.
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
The Power of Darkness...but not what you think
This weekend past, we had the honor of hosting Chris Bowater and Matt Key from "the north of England" here with us in Azle. Chris spoke to our church (in a Sunday morning meeting that took place while freezing rain fell outside) and left a real deposit of truth, but it was not only that message, but the stream of conversation that flowed between all of us, that has left me fascinated. You see, Chris seems to be carrying a deep understanding of one of the most amazing and unexplored concepts in the Kingdom: the power of obscurity. Not only does he understand it from a Biblical perspective--as he speaks of God coming in thick darkness and cloud, and showing up in unnoticed places like Bethlehem, as well as the many times Jesus told someone, "Go and tell no one..."(we never understood that in our testimonial fervor, did we now?)...but, beyond that Chris lives it. Chris' words and worship have affected not only his own nation, but places and people reaching all around the globe. He has spoken encouragement to gifted but mystified musicians countless times in private. He has dared to enter into their particular darkness, bringing a flashlight to identify the ways that God might reveal himself there. Though he has produced more worship songs, teams, schools, events and CD's than anyone I know personally, there remains a Melchezidek factor to his life and ministry--a sense in which he is known more by his Kingdom impact than his human profile. But more imporantly than that, he carries with him the ability to make you want to take refuge in God's hiddenness, rather than fight it.
I desperately needed the pill. I have lived the life of an artist with its accompanying (and exhausting) need "to be heard". Though I have found the joy of doing all I do for that holy audience of One, my culture seems to scream at me that my worship and ministry is not complete until I have some respectable sales figures and the bells and whistles that accompany such! (And by culture I mean the American church scene...) The confusion in my psyche was justifiable: I believed in the process of simply being myself and catching and processing the winds of the Holy Spirit that came my way (and turning them into words...) while leaving the results to Kingdom processes already in motion. Yet, I had succumbed a bit to judging myself by different standards. I had began to wonder if God's hiddenness as displayed through my life and our church signaled a deficiency in me/us--a wonderment which I could not afford given the mid-life nature of my personal chronology! A distinctly painful feeling reminiscent of being the last one chosen for a sports team had begun to tug often at the edges of my soul!
I now know--because of Chris' life message--that what I was missing was NOT an outlet or a vindicating breakthrough in recognition (for myself or my church)!!!Revealing may come, but THAT is not my greatest need. My greatest need is probably shared by many, especially here in America: We have unknowingly limited God to only bright light and full manifestation! We have declared unidimensionally that God is on the scene only when his blinding glory is shining for all to see, touch and perceive. We have forgotten that he comes in seasons and waves and a series of hidings and revealings, rhythms of mercy that flow with our lives...We have underestimated the huge portion of the Bible that recognizes God equally in darkness as in light. Forgetting that he is Lord of it all, we used all our human effort to push and pull on things until something--anything--showed up!!! Desperate to compete with the "signs" and "wonders" of others, we have often missed completely the tiny, precious seedlike beginnings of "signs" and "wonders" that surrounded us in hiddenness.
God's darkness is nothing like the darkness of evil. Communing with God in a place that defies sensory explanation is nothing like the despair of being alone. Rather, the thick cloud of God is dense truth so holy and so compact that it is almost tangible. It is God's awesome wisdom--line upon line upon line--paradox, mystery, contrast, dynamic tensions--all held in perfect balance by the force of unquenchable love that finds perfection only in Him. When we are that close to God, rather than filling our minds with more knowledge, he fills our hearts with Himself.
So, I am only beginning to explore the thick cloud, and lay aside the frenzy for fulfillment that only understands bright light. I know that the light is a part of God's plan, too; God of course IS light, but there's something about John 1 that seems to ring true about the context and setting of that light..."The light shines on in the darkness and the darkness is not able to extinguish it..."
The English physicist Stephen Hawking, astrophysical genius, has theorized with his typical humor that perhaps "Black holes ain't so black". It seems that black holes--giant vacuums in the universe that hold matter so tightly that nothing escapes--may actually emit traces of light and energy! If so, even the place of thickest darkness in the cosmos is not devoid of light, giving physical expression (as the heavens always do) to the Scripture:
If I say, “Surely the darkness will overwhelm me, And the light around me will be night,” Even the darkness is not dark to You, And the night is as bright as the day. Darkness and light are alike to You. Psalm 139:11-12
God help me--and all of us--carry the Melchezidek factor when we need to, SO THAT when God does set us as a city on a hill or a light out from under that bushel, we won't be moved by the change!
I desperately needed the pill. I have lived the life of an artist with its accompanying (and exhausting) need "to be heard". Though I have found the joy of doing all I do for that holy audience of One, my culture seems to scream at me that my worship and ministry is not complete until I have some respectable sales figures and the bells and whistles that accompany such! (And by culture I mean the American church scene...) The confusion in my psyche was justifiable: I believed in the process of simply being myself and catching and processing the winds of the Holy Spirit that came my way (and turning them into words...) while leaving the results to Kingdom processes already in motion. Yet, I had succumbed a bit to judging myself by different standards. I had began to wonder if God's hiddenness as displayed through my life and our church signaled a deficiency in me/us--a wonderment which I could not afford given the mid-life nature of my personal chronology! A distinctly painful feeling reminiscent of being the last one chosen for a sports team had begun to tug often at the edges of my soul!
I now know--because of Chris' life message--that what I was missing was NOT an outlet or a vindicating breakthrough in recognition (for myself or my church)!!!Revealing may come, but THAT is not my greatest need. My greatest need is probably shared by many, especially here in America: We have unknowingly limited God to only bright light and full manifestation! We have declared unidimensionally that God is on the scene only when his blinding glory is shining for all to see, touch and perceive. We have forgotten that he comes in seasons and waves and a series of hidings and revealings, rhythms of mercy that flow with our lives...We have underestimated the huge portion of the Bible that recognizes God equally in darkness as in light. Forgetting that he is Lord of it all, we used all our human effort to push and pull on things until something--anything--showed up!!! Desperate to compete with the "signs" and "wonders" of others, we have often missed completely the tiny, precious seedlike beginnings of "signs" and "wonders" that surrounded us in hiddenness.
God's darkness is nothing like the darkness of evil. Communing with God in a place that defies sensory explanation is nothing like the despair of being alone. Rather, the thick cloud of God is dense truth so holy and so compact that it is almost tangible. It is God's awesome wisdom--line upon line upon line--paradox, mystery, contrast, dynamic tensions--all held in perfect balance by the force of unquenchable love that finds perfection only in Him. When we are that close to God, rather than filling our minds with more knowledge, he fills our hearts with Himself.
So, I am only beginning to explore the thick cloud, and lay aside the frenzy for fulfillment that only understands bright light. I know that the light is a part of God's plan, too; God of course IS light, but there's something about John 1 that seems to ring true about the context and setting of that light..."The light shines on in the darkness and the darkness is not able to extinguish it..."
The English physicist Stephen Hawking, astrophysical genius, has theorized with his typical humor that perhaps "Black holes ain't so black". It seems that black holes--giant vacuums in the universe that hold matter so tightly that nothing escapes--may actually emit traces of light and energy! If so, even the place of thickest darkness in the cosmos is not devoid of light, giving physical expression (as the heavens always do) to the Scripture:
If I say, “Surely the darkness will overwhelm me, And the light around me will be night,” Even the darkness is not dark to You, And the night is as bright as the day. Darkness and light are alike to You. Psalm 139:11-12
God help me--and all of us--carry the Melchezidek factor when we need to, SO THAT when God does set us as a city on a hill or a light out from under that bushel, we won't be moved by the change!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)